Picking up the pieces…
I look at my last blog entry and I feel numb when I notice the date. There I was, recording snapshots of a typical summer evening…searching to think of something interesting to say about my mundane life. It’s true what they say about how your life can change in an instant. My 27 year old step-daughter suffered from a massive stroke on July 16th. We’ll probably never know why it happened. I guess when you think about it; it doesn’t really matter, does it? Our story is here: http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/libbyschnabel
They also say that life goes on. It does. But it’s never the same. If I could, I’d change places with Libby in a heartbeat. But I can’t. I truly believe that our life’s lesson is buried somewhere in this rubble. I am determined to find that silver lining and I’m determined to understand the reason why an otherwise healthy and happy life would suddenly take this detour.
Libby‘s life has been forever changed. That ripple-down affect has also caused me to do some serious thinking about my life and my priorities. I hope to be a better person as a result of this tragedy. My wish for Libby is to find strength and courage from those of her that love her. I wonder if she understands just how much she means to me.
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A symbol
Oh, Jenny B, I hope you realize that you are responsible for this!!!!!
Hearts be still….
Jill Schnabel now has a tattoo. Quit laughing and listen to the story. I believe a tattoo should have meaning. Well, my friends, this chilly little guy has meaning like no other.
In a nutshell, it links Patrick, Jessica, and Libby together. Here’s the story:
My son Patrick is odd. Always has been, always will be. I was going through a very difficult time when he moved to California last fall. He has such a happy spirit and I was completely lost when suddenly faced with an empty nest. Before he left, he decided to get a tattoo of an emperor penguin on his ankle. Why an emperor penguin, you ask? I asked (ok pleaded and begged) but he insisted that a person can’t possibly be unhappy if they looked down and saw a tattoo of a penguin. Really, can you argue with that? There have been several occasions when my friend, Jenny, suggested that I get a penguin tattoo to help me get through my loneliness. I thought about it…..
Months later, Libby, and collector of penguins, has a massive stroke. Once again Jenny plants a bug in my ear. She had no idea that Libby collects penguins, yet once again she mentions that I should get a penguin tattoo. OK, this penguin connection was getting to be too much. I asked Mike (not a huge fan by the way) about my absurd idea and he thought it sounded nice. Libby was unable to talk, but when I mentioned the idea to her, she smiled and nodded. That’s it….done deal!
One morning I tell my plan to Jessica. She totally freaks out and INSISTS that we get matching penguins together. That day…like right now. She searches for penguins on the internet and we instantly fall in love with our fat little guy. Off we go to Class Act Tattoo Parlor (yes, that’s really the name), and a crazy tattoo artists works on me first (I was afraid I’d chicken out if I waited). He was a very strange man and he laughed hysterically while watching Family Guy. Somehow he managed to control his laughter while the needle was against my ankle but I must admit I was freaking out a little inside. Jessica was next (she spruced hers up with additional snowflakes), but now we have a special bond. Yes, that special “Mother and Daughter with matching penguin tattoos” bond. It is our symbol to Libby that we will be by her side during her recovery.
We immediately raced to the hospital to show Libby. We made her close her eyes while we propped both of our feet next to the pillow by her head. She opened her eyes (actually they popped open) and she gave us the biggest smile we’ve seen. She couldn’t believe we actually did it. She wants a matching penguin when she recovers!
So….that’s the story of my tattoo. You can’t tell me that little guy doesn’t have meaning!
Oh, and Jenny B, I still hold you responsible!
They also say that life goes on. It does. But it’s never the same. If I could, I’d change places with Libby in a heartbeat. But I can’t. I truly believe that our life’s lesson is buried somewhere in this rubble. I am determined to find that silver lining and I’m determined to understand the reason why an otherwise healthy and happy life would suddenly take this detour.
Libby‘s life has been forever changed. That ripple-down affect has also caused me to do some serious thinking about my life and my priorities. I hope to be a better person as a result of this tragedy. My wish for Libby is to find strength and courage from those of her that love her. I wonder if she understands just how much she means to me.
***********************************************************************************
A symbol
Oh, Jenny B, I hope you realize that you are responsible for this!!!!!
Hearts be still….
Jill Schnabel now has a tattoo. Quit laughing and listen to the story. I believe a tattoo should have meaning. Well, my friends, this chilly little guy has meaning like no other.
In a nutshell, it links Patrick, Jessica, and Libby together. Here’s the story:
My son Patrick is odd. Always has been, always will be. I was going through a very difficult time when he moved to California last fall. He has such a happy spirit and I was completely lost when suddenly faced with an empty nest. Before he left, he decided to get a tattoo of an emperor penguin on his ankle. Why an emperor penguin, you ask? I asked (ok pleaded and begged) but he insisted that a person can’t possibly be unhappy if they looked down and saw a tattoo of a penguin. Really, can you argue with that? There have been several occasions when my friend, Jenny, suggested that I get a penguin tattoo to help me get through my loneliness. I thought about it…..
Months later, Libby, and collector of penguins, has a massive stroke. Once again Jenny plants a bug in my ear. She had no idea that Libby collects penguins, yet once again she mentions that I should get a penguin tattoo. OK, this penguin connection was getting to be too much. I asked Mike (not a huge fan by the way) about my absurd idea and he thought it sounded nice. Libby was unable to talk, but when I mentioned the idea to her, she smiled and nodded. That’s it….done deal!
One morning I tell my plan to Jessica. She totally freaks out and INSISTS that we get matching penguins together. That day…like right now. She searches for penguins on the internet and we instantly fall in love with our fat little guy. Off we go to Class Act Tattoo Parlor (yes, that’s really the name), and a crazy tattoo artists works on me first (I was afraid I’d chicken out if I waited). He was a very strange man and he laughed hysterically while watching Family Guy. Somehow he managed to control his laughter while the needle was against my ankle but I must admit I was freaking out a little inside. Jessica was next (she spruced hers up with additional snowflakes), but now we have a special bond. Yes, that special “Mother and Daughter with matching penguin tattoos” bond. It is our symbol to Libby that we will be by her side during her recovery.
We immediately raced to the hospital to show Libby. We made her close her eyes while we propped both of our feet next to the pillow by her head. She opened her eyes (actually they popped open) and she gave us the biggest smile we’ve seen. She couldn’t believe we actually did it. She wants a matching penguin when she recovers!
So….that’s the story of my tattoo. You can’t tell me that little guy doesn’t have meaning!
Oh, and Jenny B, I still hold you responsible!
posted by Jill at 2:42 PM
10 Comments:
ahhh Jill---- what a great story!!!! And how CAN you be sad when you look down and see that tattoo.... and know you all are linked together. I was always just teasing you though, you know!! I NEVER thought you would actually DO it but I agree, it is for a great cause! I always think of and say a prayer for Libby whenever I see a penguin =) Be sure to check your mail in the next couple of days-- I have a little goodie in there for Miss Libby that will make you smile 4 sure! Love you, tattoo and all!!
Jill, you wild woman!!!!!! How cool that you will all be linked through this little guy!! Hope Libby has hers very, very soon!!!!!
what a beautiful story Jill...and that libby will soon have one too, is just icing on the cake.
your much braver than I...but that little guy is sure cute!!!!
This actually made me cry!
I am "SO NOT a tattoo kind of girl"...but if I ever was going to be...it'd be for a reason like that.
What a fantastic mom you are!
Sweetest story ever Jilly :)
um, how cool are you jilly??? Jeez...i couldn't get my mom to get a matching tatoo with me for anything in the world!!! I love it!!!
L
Hi Jill,
We haven't been in contact for close to 3 years now, but I was one of your original DML girls (Heather Coleman-now Marcoux), anyway, I found your blog and was overwhelmed to read the story of your daughter. I struggle with a condition of the basilar artery, have to take meds every day to keep the blood flow going, so her story hits close to home. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers, I hope your daughter continues to improve and is back home before you know it.
Heather
Oh Jill!!! I'm just reading this... catching up on blogs... you are amazing! Your family is so blessed, your bond is truly a special gift.
That's such a kewl story Jilly! I can't even believe you did it, but what a sweet link to you and your kiddows.
Jill, first I want to say how sorry I am to hear about your daughter-in-law. Lindsay told me some of what you were dealing with, and you sure have been in my thoughts. Second, I love your new tatoo and the story behind it. It's awesome, and it sounds like it was a very cool family moment!
Hang in there!!
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